If you believe in karma, then the Humenanskys have been a very bad couple. Paybacks have arrived for the time that they ducked the semi-acquaintance in the grocery store, lost a wedding RSVP card, left their shed to rot in the backyard, and - - worst offense of all - - let their kids eat happy meals. (You can blame that last one just on me, Darth Vader wants nothing to do with it.)
It was bad enough when I was the only one who was receiving punishment for deeds done wrong. After swearing that I would not write just to complain about my ailments, this one has gone on long enough and has affected my workout schedule so profoundly that I think it now falls under the category of things worthy to blog about when the blog’s title is “It Runs In the Family,” because nothing is running in this family right now, and from my end, it’s a stupid, end of summer cold. I have been coughing like husky, aged male for almost two weeks now, combined with the worst sore throat I have ever had. Seriously. If you looked at the back of my throat with a flashlight, you would see something out of a horror film. I forced Darth Vader to look at it from a distance, and I think he wants to banish me from the house until it goes away. When the doctor looked at it, she said . . . and before I tell you this, I have to tell you that I have this uncanny ability to bring out the “girlfriend” in all of my female doctors. My OB was always like, “Hey giiiirl,” every time I went for a checkup while I was pregnant . . . Anyway, when my GP looked at my throat, she said, “Oh man, that is some naaaaasty stuff you’ve got back there.” I love that I make people feel comfortable when they are talking to me, but sometimes, I just want the professional opinion. What exactly IS that naaaaaasty stuff, and why is it making me feel so bad?
To make a long and boring story about my health short, my after some awkward gagging with my eyes bugged out while the assistant poked swabs at the nasty stuff in my throat, my strep test was negative. As a result, I must have a virus, like one that won’t go away, because it’s four days later and I still have the same symptoms, even after being on a Z-pack. I do feel a bit more energetic, however, hence the blog writing the night before my first full day of students instead of sleeping, packing lunches, getting my clothes ready, or any of that other productive garbage!
Consequently, the workouts have come to a halt. After three weeks of working out six days a week with renewed vigor from my decision to do the little triathlon in September and assembling my team for the Akron Marathon (thank you, thank you, my team, if you are out there), everything has just stopped due to this illness robbing me of my strength. I’m approaching that point where I get nervous about starting again. What if I can’t run as far when I feel better? Will I have to build up my leg strength again to bike well? New beginnings are great, but I have never been a fan of starting over. There is a great difference between the two.
Now onto the other adult in this family from whom karma has come to collect: Darth Vader. DV came home the other night from his weekly “track workout,” where runners of unusual speed (ROUS) run multiple times as fast as they can around an oval - - or something like that. It’s way more organized and sophisticated, but I do not partake in these so called “track workouts,” so I really have no place to be discussing them at any length. He came home and slowly, very, very slowly crept up the stairs to where I was beginning to read our kids their bedtime stories. I met him in the doorway of Princess Lea’s room. It took a millisecond to see something was wrong. “What’s wrong with you? Are you sore, hurt, injured? You’re injured, aren’t you? Do you need to, like, go to the hospital? What happened? Does anyone else know about this?” I pelted him with questions. (Sometimes I am an awesome, wife, don’t you think?)
“Injured,” he said as he gingerly sat himself in the chair in Princess Lea’s room.
Simply stated, Vader is hurt . . .for the first time ever. It’s something that I’ve known could be lurking on the horizon, but never really let myself think about. You see, Darth Vader lives a simple life. Family, running, work. These are the things he does. These are his priorities, and I completely respect him for that, but what happens when number two on the priority list gets put on the injured reserve list for a bit? You are left with family and work, which could cause a person to go mad at times, I would guess.
I guess we’re about to find out.
So the man and woman of the Humenansky household are both down for the count, while Skywalker and Princess Lea take over the world. Only time will tell how long our friend karma will stick around. I should probably go pay my library fine (for keeping children’s books too long) just incase.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Monday, August 15, 2011
Sole Sisters
I feel very fortunate to have remained close with my college girlfriends. Our relationships with each other are quite similar to that of a marriage - - especially mine, since I met most of them around the same time that I met my husband. We met at a young age, have seen each other through countless life milestones, have grown as individuals within our relationships, and have basically just enjoyed sharing life together. As with a marriage, sometimes we are over-the-moon happy while we’re together, and other times we want to throw each other out the window.
In fact, this is going to sound incredibly cheesy, but we were in a sorority together, and long, long ago - - like almost 18 years - - we did sort of "vow" to be there for each other in the good times and bad. We didn’t use those words exactly. Instead, we used silly terms like “carnation sisters” and talked about three chicks named Mary, Mary and Martha - - and no, there were no farm animals involved - - but the good and bad times? That’s what we meant. We’d be there for them both. Fortunately, for us, most of the times have been pretty good . . . more than good, actually. Sure, we have all dealt with what could be referred to as "routine emergencies," sad moments, and events that have changed our career paths or outlooks on life, but overall, we've been able to dust ourselves off and keep on keepin' on, as they say.
Last summer, however, life changed dramatically for one of my friends and her family. The unfathomable happened when she lost her oldest son in a tragic way. That is certainly her story to tell, but what I will tell you is that if you have ever thought that your heart has physically ached for a friend during an above mentioned, “routine emergency,” that is nothing compared to the sorrow you feel for a friend who has lost a child. There were no words to describe it then, and despite a year passing, I still find myself searching for the right words to describe the ache that hasn’t really gone away. Simply put, this has truly been a “bad time” for which none of us could prepare.
This summer, my friends organized a team of 35 people to participate in Lifebanc’s Gift of Life Walk and Run in honor of their son. When he passed away, my friends did a completely selfless act by donating their son’s heart valves and corneas to save or heal another person’s life - - and they made the decision to do this in the midst of life as they knew it coming to a complete halt. Amazing. Lifebanc is a non-profit organization that facilitates these kinds of decisions. The run/walk and proceeds from it supports their educational programs and organ donation in general. In their first year of organizing a team, my friends raised over $3,000 for Lifebanc in honor of their son. Again, AMAZING!!
The event was emotionally moving and light-hearted at the same time - - if that is even possible! It was healing to think about how organ donation is really “paying it forward” in the ultimate way. Organ and tissue recipients are humble and beyond grateful, while organ donors, and those who make decisions like my friends did, have made an ultimate sacrifice; they define “giving” in a way that most of us cannot even comprehend. A donor often passes on, but the legacy that they begin with their passing can lead to an on-going chain of life. It’s kind of mind-boggling, if you think about it.
Being at the event and being there with my friends from college felt right, if anything can feel right that comes out of something as unfortunate as losing one’s child. It didn’t matter if we were walking or running, or how fast we were going (which is good, because the course was REALLY, REALLY hilly). We were together, we were laughing, we were crying, we were supporting, we were sharing (um, and we were sweating - - and probably smelling - - by the end). We were doing the things that we said we’d do a long time ago when we probably were not even thinking about how a pledge of friendship would carry on into our adult lives, when being a friend would include befriending husbands, boyfriends, parents, siblings, children and other friends of our friends. By definition, I do not have a large immediate family, but events like these remind me that I have some of the most precious sisters a girl could ask for. I’ll take your good times and your bad, and I’ll even forgive you when you make me want to throw you out of a window . . . chances are, you’ve wanted to do the same to me ten times over.
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Desperately Seeking Someone(s)
I’m turning my blog into Match.com today for the purpose of finding four dates all for the same day. Here are my qualifications for my future mates: There are only two, so pay attention or you might miss them: 1.) You need to be able to propel yourself forward. 2) You need to be available for our date on September 24 . . . of this year.
It doesn’t matter if you are male or female.
It also doesn’t matter if you have another special someone in your life. Look at me! I’m married after all, quite happily actually. (Now you do have to be okay with the fact that my husband is probably WAY better at what we are going to be doing on our date than you are, but please keep in mind that he works on it like six days out of seven, so don’t let that dissuade you from being my date. I am an equal opportunity “dater,” and frankly, despite all of the practice we get around here, I am not very good at it either, so please do not be intimidated.)
See? Look how I am so not picky!! This seems easy enough, right? Okay, so before you go knocking down my door . . . or thinking that I have lost my last marbles writing innuendo jokes, let me tell you the other details.
I need a team for the Akron Marathon Relay!! You see, I sort of messed things up from a team aspect earlier this year when I trained for and completed the 10K at the Cleveland Marathon back in May. I did not miss a run in my training program, going from a consistent, mundane three miles only three times a week, to running 3.5 to 6 miles at least three times a week. It was a true testament to the fact that picking a goal, making a plan, and sticking to that plan down to the last detail really does work and can leave a person feeling amazingly accomplished once that goal is met. Though I had run 6.2 miles before, I had never completed that distance in an actual event, and though I was still slow, I did the 10K that day in May with virtually no issues. I felt phenomenal when I was done! I could conquer the world at that point!! Rawwwrrrr!!
The day after the Cleveland Marathon, I made Darth Vader help me with a new plan. The possibilities were endless!! I would do a 10-miler in August! I would defeat the half-marathon-monkey on my back in September at the Akron Marathon!! I would become svelte in the process!
Not only did I plan this with Darth Vader, but I also committed the cardinal sin of goal setting. I told a BUNCH of people about it. It seems that I have an itty-bitty problem when it comes to keeping things to myself. (This should not be a surprise. I do have this blog after all.) The problem that resulted from my big mouth this time was that in telling some former relay teammates of mine that I was looking to achieve half-marathon greatness, I let them off the hook! They haven’t had time to train; they haven’t had time to mentally prepare.
Then May turned into June. Then it got hot, and if you’ve been reading, you know I don’t like to run when it’s hot. I don’t know, something about the sweat runnels from my forehead mixing with the “sweat proof” sunscreen on my face and dripping into my eyes causing extreme stinging and blindness is just kind of a turn off. And that’s only part of it.
So, yeah, the dreams of vastly increasing my distance from 6.2 miles to 13.1 evaporated with the heat as the temperatures this summer have climbed to and are hovering in the balmy, sticky, oppressive range. I alienated my teammates, and now I am searching for some by means of my blog. (Good thing this isn’t real dating or I would have a major complex about myself at this point.)
Here’s what I need: Four people to run a combined total of approximately 20.5 miles. I would like to do the 5.7 mile leg of the relay, but I am willing to do the 3.5 or 6.2. There are 2.8 and 8 mile portions as well.
If you haven’t participated in or witnessed the Akron Marathon, or “Run the Bird” as their slogan reports, it really is a fun event. THOUSANDS of people do it -- people of ALL shapes, sizes, and running abilities (some people even form teams and walk the whole thing). The course runs through many different Akron sights, so if you haven’t thought nicely about Akron recently, being on the course may remind you of some of the cool things about our thriving metropolis (or the closest bigger city that we’ve got). It takes place in September, so the weather is usually quite temperate, and it starts at seven in the morning, so even if it is going to get warm, that doesn’t happen until later. Finally, there is a fun little party at the Akron Aeros’ stadium when you finish with food AND there are free beer tickets on your race bib. That’s enough incentive right there, if you ask me! (Uh, and the Barley House is right next door to the finish, so moving the after party over there is also a fun option, too.)
So if you are feeling like you’d like to “go out” with me on Saturday, September 24, 2011, please let me know. Send me an email, comment here, send me a message on FB, or tell me in person the next time we see each other. Please do not worry about speed. This will be a very non-competitive team. We’re just doing it because it is fun, it feels great to get up and do something healthy with thousands of other people, and there’s beer at the end . . . just kidding, well, sort of. And do not worry. If you are a commitment-phobe, I won’t bug you after this one date. I’m not looking for a long-term relationship; I promise I won’t try to tie you down. Think about it!
Check out the website for further details: www.akronmarathon.org
It doesn’t matter if you are male or female.
It also doesn’t matter if you have another special someone in your life. Look at me! I’m married after all, quite happily actually. (Now you do have to be okay with the fact that my husband is probably WAY better at what we are going to be doing on our date than you are, but please keep in mind that he works on it like six days out of seven, so don’t let that dissuade you from being my date. I am an equal opportunity “dater,” and frankly, despite all of the practice we get around here, I am not very good at it either, so please do not be intimidated.)
See? Look how I am so not picky!! This seems easy enough, right? Okay, so before you go knocking down my door . . . or thinking that I have lost my last marbles writing innuendo jokes, let me tell you the other details.
I need a team for the Akron Marathon Relay!! You see, I sort of messed things up from a team aspect earlier this year when I trained for and completed the 10K at the Cleveland Marathon back in May. I did not miss a run in my training program, going from a consistent, mundane three miles only three times a week, to running 3.5 to 6 miles at least three times a week. It was a true testament to the fact that picking a goal, making a plan, and sticking to that plan down to the last detail really does work and can leave a person feeling amazingly accomplished once that goal is met. Though I had run 6.2 miles before, I had never completed that distance in an actual event, and though I was still slow, I did the 10K that day in May with virtually no issues. I felt phenomenal when I was done! I could conquer the world at that point!! Rawwwrrrr!!
The day after the Cleveland Marathon, I made Darth Vader help me with a new plan. The possibilities were endless!! I would do a 10-miler in August! I would defeat the half-marathon-monkey on my back in September at the Akron Marathon!! I would become svelte in the process!
Not only did I plan this with Darth Vader, but I also committed the cardinal sin of goal setting. I told a BUNCH of people about it. It seems that I have an itty-bitty problem when it comes to keeping things to myself. (This should not be a surprise. I do have this blog after all.) The problem that resulted from my big mouth this time was that in telling some former relay teammates of mine that I was looking to achieve half-marathon greatness, I let them off the hook! They haven’t had time to train; they haven’t had time to mentally prepare.
Then May turned into June. Then it got hot, and if you’ve been reading, you know I don’t like to run when it’s hot. I don’t know, something about the sweat runnels from my forehead mixing with the “sweat proof” sunscreen on my face and dripping into my eyes causing extreme stinging and blindness is just kind of a turn off. And that’s only part of it.
So, yeah, the dreams of vastly increasing my distance from 6.2 miles to 13.1 evaporated with the heat as the temperatures this summer have climbed to and are hovering in the balmy, sticky, oppressive range. I alienated my teammates, and now I am searching for some by means of my blog. (Good thing this isn’t real dating or I would have a major complex about myself at this point.)
Here’s what I need: Four people to run a combined total of approximately 20.5 miles. I would like to do the 5.7 mile leg of the relay, but I am willing to do the 3.5 or 6.2. There are 2.8 and 8 mile portions as well.
If you haven’t participated in or witnessed the Akron Marathon, or “Run the Bird” as their slogan reports, it really is a fun event. THOUSANDS of people do it -- people of ALL shapes, sizes, and running abilities (some people even form teams and walk the whole thing). The course runs through many different Akron sights, so if you haven’t thought nicely about Akron recently, being on the course may remind you of some of the cool things about our thriving metropolis (or the closest bigger city that we’ve got). It takes place in September, so the weather is usually quite temperate, and it starts at seven in the morning, so even if it is going to get warm, that doesn’t happen until later. Finally, there is a fun little party at the Akron Aeros’ stadium when you finish with food AND there are free beer tickets on your race bib. That’s enough incentive right there, if you ask me! (Uh, and the Barley House is right next door to the finish, so moving the after party over there is also a fun option, too.)
So if you are feeling like you’d like to “go out” with me on Saturday, September 24, 2011, please let me know. Send me an email, comment here, send me a message on FB, or tell me in person the next time we see each other. Please do not worry about speed. This will be a very non-competitive team. We’re just doing it because it is fun, it feels great to get up and do something healthy with thousands of other people, and there’s beer at the end . . . just kidding, well, sort of. And do not worry. If you are a commitment-phobe, I won’t bug you after this one date. I’m not looking for a long-term relationship; I promise I won’t try to tie you down. Think about it!
Check out the website for further details: www.akronmarathon.org
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